Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
