remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I'm at about main and main street
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
