But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Randomize
