This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I cut my penus on the lid.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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