I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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