My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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