Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
