Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i think i have two assholes
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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