im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
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