i may or may not be watching the land before time
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
