i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Alive.
So much puke
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize