i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
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