Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize