Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize