you're like a bully in the Christmas story
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize