I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
