I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
