Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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