oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
