More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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