Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
