you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Actions speak louder than pants.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
