He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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