ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
