What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize