You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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