Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
