please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize