Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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