I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
