Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
