it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
