so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
