"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
