You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
