all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
