I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize