Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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