I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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