do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
