i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Randomize