this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
