I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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