I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize