i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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