he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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