Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Boobs speak an international language.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
