So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
