Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize