But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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