Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It's never too late to be topless.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
