i don't like sucking hair
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
