Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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